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Apego desorganizado: El estilo de apego más incomprendido: cómo sanar el trauma de apego cuando lo que más quieres te da más miedo
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Publisher: Independently Published
Pages: 130
Weight: 0.40
Height: 0.31 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: Spanish
Buscas cercanÃa y huyes de ella ante la misma persona, a veces el mismo dÃa. Esa contradicción te ha convencido de que hay algo roto en tu manera de amar.
Hay un cuarto estilo de apego que casi nadie te explicó. Has leÃdo sobre los estilos de apego en adultos, conoces el ansioso y el evitativo, pero no terminas de encajar en ninguno, porque haces las dos cosas a la vez. Ese patrón tiene nombre, tiene un origen que puedes rastrear y, sobre todo, tiene salida.
Este libro sostiene una idea que va contra lo que sueles escuchar sobre las relaciones: tu forma de acercarte y retirarte es coherente con su origen. Se formó cuando la figura que debÃa protegerte era también la que encendÃa tu alarma, y por eso tu sistema nervioso aprendió a buscar y a defenderse en el mismo gesto. Aprendiste a querer en condiciones imposibles, y eso deja marca, aunque no te condena.
A partir del hallazgo con que Mary Main y Judith Solomon completaron el mapa del apego en 1986, SofÃa Duarte recorre cómo se forma este patrón, por qué no hace falta un cuidador monstruoso para heredarlo, cómo aparece en tu vida amorosa adulta y por qué te desconectas justo en el peor momento de una discusión.
Después llega lo que rara vez alcanza al lector no especialista: un mapa concreto para sanar el trauma de apego. El protocolo de la Figura Parental Ideal de Daniel Brown y David Elliott, la mentalización de Peter Fonagy y los casos reales de quienes pasaron de la desorganización al apego seguro ganado.
Es un libro para quien reconoce en sà mismo el apego temeroso evitativo, el miedo a la intimidad en pareja, las heridas emocionales de la infancia que reaparecen cuando alguien se acerca de verdad y el autosabotaje en las relaciones que nunca supo explicar.
Con la calidez de una terapeuta que se sienta contigo a explicártelo, sin jerga y sin juicio, aquà empieza a tener sentido lo que más quieres y más miedo te da.
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