Sign-In
Cart
Security? Me?: The Chronicles of Dreadman Vigilante
Paperback
Publisher: Independently Published
Published: Jun 23 2025
Pages: 486
Weight: 1.42
Height: 1.08 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
SECURITY? ME? - The Chronicles of Dreadman Vigilante
By Geoffrey Zachary
They asked for security. He brought vibes... and a goat.
In the heart of Brixton, where the trolleys squeak, the shoplifters run fast, and the security cameras somehow always miss the action, one man is on a mission to protect the people. Or at least... try.
Meet Ras Levi Dreadman Marley - proud Rasta, spiritual philosopher, part-time poet, and the entirely unqualified founder of One Love Protection Services. His tools? Good energy, reggae wisdom, herbal tea, and an alarming lack of actual security training. His uniform? A reggae high-vis, flip-flops, and a goat called Ziggy (don't ask about the stripes). His plan? Dubious at best.
When Levi decides to launch a one-man retail security empire, Brixton isn't ready. Frankly, neither is he. But what he lacks in experience, he makes up for with unstoppable confidence, creative thinking, and a determination to keep the peace - even if that means chasing shoplifters with a trolley, holding staff meditation circles during peak shopping hours, or mistaking an international security conference for a free Zoom seminar.
In this laugh-out-loud, sharply observed comedy memoir-meets-sitcom, Geoffrey Zachary delivers a riotous collection of self-contained misadventures that follow Levi from his first chaotic shift guarding a Brixton electronics store to becoming an accidental viral sensation and spiritual icon of retail resistance.
Expect:
Hilarious security fails - from the infamous Handshake that Cost 400 to the Banana Stand Sting
Spiritual wisdom in all the wrong places - including aisle 7, the freezer section, and the staff toilet
Recurring retail chaos - featuring goat-led patrols, reggae sound systems, and unsolicited poetry slams at the till
Heart, community, and a gentle poke at modern surveillance culture, bureaucracy, and urban life
Whether he's blessing the rice aisle, hosting a solo Security Summit in his garden shed, or trying to enforce retail peace through Nyabinghi drum circles, Levi proves one thing over and over:
You don't need a badge to guard your people. You just need vibes... and possibly a goat.
Fans of
- The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole
- The World According to Clarkson
- Born a Crime
- Diary of a Wimpy Kid (for adults)
- Urban British satire and Caribbean comedy
...will fall in love with Levi's chaotic charm, Brixton's eccentric heartbeat, and the unforgettable mess that is One Love Protection Services.
Protect the plantain. Secure the people. The goat's optional... but recommended.
Scroll up, grab your copy, and laugh your way through Brixton's most unconventional security operation.
Also from
Zachary, Geoffrey
The Persecution of the Working Man: Behind the scenes of, the daily realities of People propping up societies
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Good on the Dark Web: Unveiling the Hidden Potential for Positive Change
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Shadows of Slavery: Unveiling the Enduring Legacy of Black Oppression
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
1000 Prayers for Every Season of Life: A Daily Devotional for Strength, Healing, Guidance, and Peace
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
Farage's First 100 Days as PM: A Speculative Chronicle of Sovereignty, Smoke, and Sudden Shockwaves
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Existence Protocol: The System Decides Who. Exists. She Decides Who Lives.
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Feast of Resonance: They came not to invade our world - but to taste our souls
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Saffron Heretic: Beneath the Waves, Secrets Rise: T nTale of Power, Faith and the Shadow of the Past
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
Orange River: Where Time Flows Eternal: A Tale of Legacy, Spirit, and the Mystical Currents of the Maya
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Silent Vanguard: In the Shadows, He Saves Lives. in the Light, He's the Enemy
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Numbers That Change Reality: How Ancient Codes, Modern Frequencies & Mind-Sequences Rewire Life
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
3i the Atlas Visitor: From the edge of another star, it came not to study us - but to remember.
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
God, I Am Good (Said Pops, Wrongly): A multicultural Hawaiian family comedy where love, chaos, and coconuts collide.
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
Nostradamus the Awakening Cycle: How the 2026 Prophecies Reveal a New Age of Humanity
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Long Shadow of Civilisation: How Agriculture, Parasites, and Progress Rewrote the Human Body
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Quiet Geometry of Money: Why Wealth Is Made in Silence, Lost in Noise, and Recovered in Cycles
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
Carrots And Sumantra: Contrasting External (Carrots-and-Sticks) Ans Intrinsic Motivation Models
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
Leaping into the Unknown: Tales of Risk, Resilience: Financial Breakthroughs, and the Lessons Learned from Risk and Rewards
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Axis Veil: The Sacred Mountain That Guards a Secret No One Survives to Tell
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Quantum Prophecy: A Tale of Parallel Realities and Ultimate Sacrifice
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
Minds Unbound: Stories and Strategies for Living With Learning Disabilities
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Last Witnress: He Walked Into the Dead Zone. Now the Truth Is Walking Out with Him
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
Consent: When a dream won't end at waking, you haven't escaped - it's just begun.
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Million-Year Empire: Earth's Forgotten Supercivi;ization and the War for the Future
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Secret Heiress Files: Old money never dies-It just buries secrets deeper
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Second Face: The Secret History of Body Doubles, Decoys, and Ghost Leaders
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
Ashes of the Borderline: Two nations, One war. No way back-except through memory
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Illusionists How the New Rich Rule by Image: A Nonfiction Investigation Into Image, Power, and the New Aristocracy
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
The Omega Machine: A Nation Denied. A Weapon Unleashed. The Countdown to Extinction Begins.
Zachary, Geoffrey
Paperback
Also in
General Drama
Freeing the Natural Voice: Imagery and Art in the Practice of Voice and Language (Revised & Expanded)
Linklater, Kristin
Paperback
Book Meets World: The Definitive Inside Story of the Hit Sitcom Boy Meets World
Strong, Rider
Friedle, Will
Fishel, Danielle
Hardcover
How to Succeed in Musical Theatre Without Really Dying: The Actor's Guide to Booking Work and Building a Career That Lasts
Mendez, Lindsay
Oliver, Ryan Scott
Paperback
Funny Business: The Old-School Wedding Crashers and Knocked-Up Virgins Who Changed Comedy Forever
Singer, Matt
Hardcover
The NEW Comedy Bible: The Ultimate Guide to Writing and Performing Stand-Up Comedy
Carter, Judy
Paperback
The Golden Girls Cookbook: More Than 90 Delectable Recipes from Blanche, Rose, Dorothy, and Sophia
Styler, Christopher
Hardcover
Drama Projects for the Middle School Classroom: A Collection of Theatre Activities for Young Actors
Young, Rebecca
Paperback
Essentials of Screenwriting: The Art, Craft, and Business of Film and Television Writing
Walter, Richard
Paperback
Drama Teacher's Survival Guide--Volume 2: Activities, Exercises, and Techniques for the Theatre Classroom
Johnson, Margaret F.
Paperback
Fawlty Towers: Fawlts and All: A 50th Anniversary Celebration of the Nation's Beloved Sitcom
Cleese, John
Hardcover
Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream for Kids: 3 Short Melodramatic Plays for 3 Group Sizes
Kelso, Brendan P.
Paperback
A Century of Music Under the Stars: A History of the Mann Center for the Performing Arts and Robin Hood Dell
McCarthy, Jack
The Mann Center for the Performing Arts
Hardcover
Scoundrels, Villains, & Knaves: Disneyland, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Popular Culture
Nolte, Foxx
Paperback
The Cool Ruler-The Incredible Life Story of Gregory Isaacs(Message, Missteps and Mastery of a Musical Maestro)
Price, Peter
Paperback
The Men Who Would Be King: An Almost Epic Tale of Moguls, Movies, and a Company Called DreamWorks
Laporte, Nicole
Paperback
An Introduction to the Art of Theatre--Student Text: A Comprehensive Text -- Past, Present, and Future
Cassady, Marsh
Paperback
Drama Teacher's Survival Guide--Volume 1: A Complete Handbook for Play Production
Johnson, Margaret F.
Paperback
Large Print Dot To Dot Book For Senior: 50 Large Print Easy Dot To Dot Nature Scenes, Flowers, Butterflies &, Animals, dinosaur, .. & Birds And More (
James S Wagner Dot Book House
Paperback
Live from New York: The Complete, Uncensored History of Saturday Night Live as Told by Its Stars, Writers, and Guests
Shales, Tom
Miller, James Andrew
Paperback
The Theatrical Adventures of Edward Gorey: Rare Drawings, Scripts, and Stories
Verburg, Carol
Hardcover
Rhinoceros and Other Plays: Includes: The Leader; The Future Is in Eggs; It Takes All Kinds to Make a World
Ionesco, Eugene
Paperback
The Official Rocky Horror Late Night Double Feature: The 50th Anniversary Two-Volume Collector's Edition
O'Brien, Linus
O'Brien, Richard
Hardcover
Champions for the Arts: Lessons and Successful Strategies for Engaging Diverse Audiences
Walker-Kuhne, Donna
Paperback
Period Costume for Stage & Screen: Patterns for Women's Dress, Medieval - 1500
Hunnisett, Jean
Paperback
The Comedy Bible Workbook: The Interactive Companion to "The New Comedy Bible"
Carter, Judy
Paperback