Sign-In
Cart
The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity
Hardcover
ISBN13: 9780062322586
Publisher: Harper
Published: Oct 1 2017
Pages: 336
Weight: 1.40
Height: 1.10 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
Iconic couples' therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity Esther Perel returns with a provocative look at relationships through the lens of infidelity.
An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo--universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat--even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book.
For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage--with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart.
Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships--what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations.
Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.
Also in
Sexuality
Freeing Sexuality: Psychologists, Consent Teachers, Polyamory Experts, and Sex Workers Speak Out
Miller, Richard Louis
Paperback
Come as You Are: Revised and Updated: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life
Nagoski, Emily
Paperback
Love in a F*cked-Up World: How to Build Relationships, Hook Up, and Raise Hell Together
Spade, Dean
Paperback
Come Together: The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections
Nagoski, Emily
Paperback
A Celebration of Sex: A Guide to Enjoying God's Gift of Sexual Intimacy
Rosenau, Douglas E.
Paperback
The Ethical Slut, Third Edition: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Freedoms in Sex and Love
Hardy, Janet W.
Easton, Dossie
Paperback
The New Age of Sexism: How AI and Emerging Technologies Are Reinventing Misogyny
Bates, Laura
Hardcover
Wayward Lives, Beautiful Experiments: Intimate Histories of Riotous Black Girls, Troublesome Women, and Queer Radicals
Hartman, Saidiya
Paperback
Unfuck Your Kink: Using Science to Enjoy Mind-Blowing Bdsm, Fetishes, Fantasy, Porn, and Whatever Your Pervy Heart Desires
Harper, Faith G.
Paperback
The Anxious Person's Guide to Non-Monogamy: Your Guide to Open Relationships, Polyamory and Letting Go
Phoenix, Lola
Paperback
Unfuck Your Intimacy: Using Science for Better Relationships, Sex, and Dating
Harper, Faith G.
Paperback
The Book That Taught the World to Orgasm and Then Disappeared: Shere Hite and the Hite Report
Campbell, Rosa
Hardcover
You Could Be Having Better Sex: The Definitive Guide to a Happier, Healthier, and Hotter Sex Life
McNichols, Nicole
Hardcover
A Married Sex: A Christian Couple's Guide to Reimagining Your Love Life (Itpe)
Thomas, Gary
Fileta, Debra K.
Paperback
Unfuck Your Intimacy Workbook: Using Science for Better Dating, Sex, and Relationships
Harper, Faith G.
Paperback
Abortion Pill Zine: A Community Guide to Misoprostol and Mifepristone
Rotman, Isabella
Galloway, Marnie
Paperback
Refusing Compulsory Sexuality: A Black Asexual Lens on Our Sex-Obsessed Culture
Brown, Sherronda J.
Paperback
Drink Water and Mind Your Business: A Black Woman's Guide to Unlearning the Bs and Healing Your Self-Esteem
Oriowo, Donna
Paperback
Embracing the Old Witch in the Woods: Liberating Feminine Wisdom from Christian Patriarchy
Harris, Shannon
Herrington, Angela J.
Paperback
Seeking Sexual Freedom: African Rites, Rituals, and Sankofa in the Bedroom
Sekyiamah, Nana Darkoa
Hardcover
Meals She Eats: Empowering Advice, Relatable Stories, and Over 25 Recipes to Take Control of Your Pcos
Sullivan, Tom
Sullivan, Rachael
Hardcover
The Period Brain: The New Science of Why We PMS and How to Fix It: A Manifesto for Women
Hill Ph. D., Sarah E.
Hardcover
Kink Curious: A Guide to Exploring Your Kinks, Dispelling Shame, and Staying Safe
Engle, Gigi
Paperback
The Fourth Trimester: A Postpartum Guide to Healing Your Body, Balancing Your Emotions, and Restoring Your Vitality
Johnson, Kimberly Ann
Paperback
Love Talk: Speak Each Other's Language Like You Never Have Before
Parrott, Les
Parrott, Leslie
Paperback
The Kama Sutra (Royal Collector's Edition) (Annotated) (Case Laminate Hardcover with Jacket)
Vātsyāyana
Hardcover
S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-To-Know Sexuality Guide to Get You Through Your Teens and Twenties
Corinna, Heather
Paperback
The Sexuality of Care: On Nursing, Kink, and a Future Without Hospitals
Thekkumkattil, M. K.
Paperback
Jewel in the Lotus/The Tantric Path to Higher Consciousness
Saraswati, Sunyata
Avinasha, Bodhi
Paperback
Desire: An Inclusive Guide to Navigating Libido Differences in Relationships
Mersy, Lauren Fogel
Vencill, Jennifer A.
Paperback
Pleasure, Please!: The Black Woman's Guide to Unapologetic Pleasure and Confidence
Cobb, Ashley K.
Paperback
Why Men Want Sex and Women Need Love: Unravelling the Simple Truth
Pease, Barbara
Pease, Allan
Paperback
The Jealousy Workbook: Exercises and Insights for Managing Open Relationships
Labriola, Kathy
Paperback
The Man's Guide to Women: Scientifically Proven Secrets from the Love Lab about What Women Really Want
Gottman, Julie Schwartz
Gottman, John
Abrams, Douglas
Hardcover
Playing Well with Others: Your Field Guide to Discovering, Exploring and Navigating the Kink, Leather and Bdsm Communities
Harrington, Lee
Williams, Mollena
Paperback
The Ethical Slut Workbook: An Adventurer's Companion to Joyous, Sustainable Relationships of All Kinds
Easton, Dossie
Hardy, Janet W.
Paperback
The Joy of Gay Sex: Fully Revised and Expanded Third Edition
Silverstein, Charles
Picano, Felice
Paperback
Love Forever Sex Position a Day Calendar: 365 Sex Positions You've Never Tried, Kama Sutra for The Modern Era
Eden, Allison
Paperback
Passionate Marriage: Love, Sex, and Intimacy in Emotionally Committed Relationships
Schnarch, David
Paperback
American Infidelity: The Gilded Age Battle Over Freethought, Free Love, and Feminism
Green, Steven K.
Hardcover
Sex Magic: Take Your Body, Mind, and Relationship to the Next Level with Spectacular Intimacy
Berman, Laura, PhD
Hardcover
Brave Love, Great Sex: Harnessing Attachment Theory for Passionate Relationships
Faller, George, Lmft
Watson, Laurie, PhD
Hardcover
The Ace and Aro Relationship Guide: Making It Work in Friendship, Love, and Sex
Daigle-Orians, Cody
Paperback
Mirror of Intimacy: Daily Reflections on Emotional and Erotic Intelligence
Katehakis, Alexandra
Bliss, Tom
Paperback
Gender Magic: Live Shamelessly, Reclaim Your Joy, & Step Into Your Most Authentic Self
McDaniel, Rae
Paperback
And Baby Makes Three: The Six-Step Plan for Preserving Marital Intimacy and Rekindling Romance After Baby Arrives
Gottman, John
Gottman, Julie Schwartz
Paperback
The Transmasculine Guide to Physical Transition: For Trans, Nonbinary, and Other Masculine Folks
Buch, Sage
Paperback
Sex Positions: Three Book Bundle Including BDSM Roleplays & Sub/Dom Guides
Book Club, More Sex More Fun
Paperback
Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships
Jetha, Cacilda
Ryan, Christopher
Paperback
The Better Sex Through Mindfulness Workbook: A Guide to Cultivating Desire
Phd Brotto, Lori
Paperback
Butt Seriously: The Definitive Guide to Anal Health, Pleasure, and Everything in Between
Goldstein, Evan
Paperback
The Fisher King and the Handless Maiden: Understanding the Wounded Feeling Functi
Johnson, Robert A.
Paperback
Testo Junkie: Sex, Drugs, and Biopolitics in the Pharmacopornographic Era
Preciado, Paul B.
Paperback
101 Nights of Great Sex (2020 Edition!): Secret Sealed Seductions for Fun-Loving Couples
Corn, Laura
Paperback
Kinky History: A Rollicking Journey Through Our Sexual Past, Present, and Future
James, Esmé Louise
Hardcover
La Guía de la Chica Buena Para Un Sexo Increíble: Cómo Crear Un Matrimonio Santo Y Apasionado
Gregoire, Sheila Wray
Paperback
Sounds Fake But Okay: An Asexual and Aromantic Perspective on Love, Relationships, Sex, and Pretty Much Anything Else
Costello, Sarah
Kaszyca, Kayla
Paperback