Sign-In
Cart
Dreams & Drugs: It's Complicated
Paperback
Publisher: Independently Published
Published: Jul 4 2026
Pages: 96
Weight: 0.27
Height: 0.20 Width: 5.50 Depth: 8.50
Language: English
This is a collection of poems written during my teens and early twenties, when addiction was at its most intimate. The poems move between sobriety, relapse, and the uneasy thresholds in between; where hope and fear coexist.
The writing is unapologetically inward. Many of the poems orbit the self: its pain, its grandeur, its urgency to be witnessed. Read now, they can resemble narcissistic records of suffering, yet they also reveal an early self-awareness, like a recognition of that self-absorption, and an inability to stop documenting it anyway. Whether this intensity belongs to youth, addiction, or both is left unresolved.
An unintentional religious undertone runs throughout, particularly Christian language of guilt, judgement, and self-surveillance. I was not religious at the time and am even less so now. Rereading these poems suggests those motifs were inherited rather than chosen, shaped by a childhood where individual pain was discouraged unless it served the collective.
Taken together, these poems are less a performance than a record. They document a mind trying to survive itself, oscillating between insight and denial, arrogance and collapse: before balance, distance, or forgiveness were possible.
ContentsDreams
15 A Dreamer at School16 Try-Hard
17 Blossoming
18 The Gambler
19 Gone Finishing
20 Rooting
21 Move Mountains
22 Believe it or Not, It's Just Me The Greatest American Heron Theme song
23 On Behalf of Misfits Everywhere
25 What I Know
26 Be Beautiful
27 The Maddest Vigilante
28 Freedom Writer
30 People Like Me #3
31 Pick Your play
33 Ndezvenyu (That's your problem, that's a you problem)
35 Why Role Models are important
36 Grit #1
37 Courage: Know it, & know it well
38 A Soldier's Tale
39 Grit #2
40 Baton
41 I Will Change the World
42 Don't Suffer Fools
43 Not Afraid
45 The Ascension: You cannot take everybody with you
46 Becoming: A prayer
47 Kids Like Me
48 Do You Realise That You're a Champion?
49 Little Fish
50 How Did You Do It?
51 Friendly Reminder
52 First, You Must Crawl
53 Good morning, Sunshine
54 The Functioning Depressive in Capitalism
56 What Took You So Long?
Drugs 60 THE HOOK TO MY PETER61 DEATH NOTE
62 METAMORPHOSIS
63 SCARS & TATTOOS
64 THE ADDICT
65 (DON'T) DO DRUGS, KIDS
66 DONE BEING SOBER
67 SAD KID SOCIETY
68 WHERE DO SAD GUYS GO?
69 THEY SAY IT'S A DISEASE
71 SELF CRITICAL
72 SADKID SPEAKS
73 SELF HATE
74 I CAN QUIT WHEN I LIKE...
75 DAVE'S STORY
76 RELAPSE
77 LETHARGY
78 DREAMS & DRUGS: IT'S COMPLICATED
79 PEOPLE LIKE ME #1
80 CONVERSATIONS WITH MYSELF
81 NOTE TO SELF
82 DETOX
83 DAMNED AND SAVED
84 TOXIC HEDONISM
85 SEND ME FLOWERS
86 PEOPLE LIKE ME #2
87 HI, MY NAME IS KAREN, & I'M AN ADDICT
Also from
Mutsatsa, Karen
Also in
Young Adult Nonfiction
Consider the Platypus: Evolution Through Biology's Most Baffling Beasts
Sandford, Maggie Ryan
Hardcover
Large Print Easy Color & Frame - Stress Free: Adult Coloring Book with 31 Designs Flowers, Mandalas & Nature Perforated Pages, Spiral Bound Gift for A
New Seasons
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
Large Print Easy Color & Frame - Calm (Stress Free Coloring Book)
Publications International Ltd
New Seasons
Paperback
Cursive Handwriting Workbook for Teens: Exercises to Learn, Practice, and Improve
Briggs, Missy
Paperback
Braiding Sweetgrass for Young Adults: Indigenous Wisdom, Scientific Knowledge, and the Teachings of Plants
Gray Smith, Monique
Kimmerer, Robin Wall
Paperback
GED Test Prep Plus, Tenth Edition (2026): Includes a Diagnostic Pretest, 2 Full Length Practice Tests, 1000+ Practice Questions, and 60+ Online Videos
Kaplan Test Prep
Van Slyke, Caren
Paperback
Just Mercy (Adapted for Young Adults): A True Story of the Fight for Justice
Stevenson, Bryan
Paperback
GED Test Prep, Tenth Edition (2026): Includes a Diagnostic Pretest, 2 Full Length Practice Tests, 1000+ Practice Questions, and 40+ Online Videos
Van Slyke, Caren
Kaplan Test Prep
Paperback
Color & Frame - In the Forest (Adult Coloring Book)
New Seasons
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
Be Yourself and Other Bad Advice: A Teen Girl's Guide to Unlearning the Rules
Walker, Meredith
Paperback
Self-Love Journal for Teen Girls: Prompts and Practices to Inspire Confidence and Celebrate You
Whitehead, Cindy
Paperback
Brain Games - Sticker by Number: Ocean Treasures (13 Images to Sticker)
Brain Games
Publications International Ltd
New Seasons
Paperback
We Are Displaced: My Journey and Stories from Refugee Girls Around the World
Yousafzai, Malala
Paperback
The Super Easy Teen Baking Cookbook: 60 Simple Step-By-Step Recipes
Schotland, Marlynn Jayme
Paperback
Color & Frame - Ocean Treasures (Adult Coloring Book)
Publications International Ltd
New Seasons
Paperback
Trans History: A Graphic Novel: From Ancient Times to the Present Day
Combs, Alex L.
Eakett, Andrew
Paperback
The Case for Faith: A Journalist Investigates the Toughest Objections to Christianity
Strobel, Lee
Paperback
Large Print Easy Color & Frame - Mindfulness (Stress Free Coloring Book)
New Seasons
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
It's Trevor Noah: Born a Crime: Stories from a South African Childhood (Adapted for Young Readers)
Noah, Trevor
Paperback
Everything You Need to Ace Pre-Algebra and Algebra 1 in One Big Fat Notebook
Wang, Jason
Workman Publishing
Paperback
Stealing Saint Nick: A Legendary Corpse, a Notorious Theft, and the Stories That Shape the World
Anderson, M. T.
Hardcover
A Better World Is Possible: Global Youth Confront the Climate Crisis
Novgorodoff, Danica
Subramanian, Meera
Hardcover
SAT Study Guide Premium, 2027: 3 Practice Tests + Comprehensive Review + Online Practice and Video Lessons
Stewart, Brian W., M. Ed
Paperback
Stamped: Racism, Antiracism, and You: A Remix of the National Book Award-Winning Stamped from the Beginning
Kendi, Ibram X.
Reynolds, Jason
Paperback
Getting Started with Arduino: The Open Source Electronics Prototyping Platform
Shiloh, Michael
Banzi, Massimo
Paperback
I Want More Pizza: Real World Money Skills For High School, College, And Beyond
Burkholder, Steve
Paperback
Brain Games - Sticker by Number - Vintage: Flowers (28 Images to Sticker)
New Seasons
Brain Games
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
ACT Study Guide Premium, 2026: 6 Practice Tests + Comprehensive Review + Online Practice for the New Enhanced ACT
Stewart, Brian, M. Ed
Paperback
Mindfulness Coloring Book for Teens: Reduce Anxiety, Increase Focus, and Spark Creativity
Rockridge Press
Paperback
Everything You Need to Ace Biology in One Big Fat Notebook
Brown, Matthew
Workman Publishing
Paperback
Pilot's Handbook of Aeronautical Knowledge: Faa-H-8083-25c
Federal Aviation Administration (FAA)
Paperback
Brain Games - Color by Number: Butterflies - Stress-Free Adult Coloring Book with Tear-Out Pages Relaxing Activity for Paint by Number Lovers Gift for
New Seasons
Publications International Ltd
Brain Games
Paperback
I Will Always Write Back: How One Letter Changed Two Lives
Ganda, Martin
Alifirenka, Caitlin
Paperback
The 57 Bus: A True Story of Two Teenagers and the Crime That Changed Their Lives
Slater, Dashka
Hardcover
Rich Dad Poor Dad for Teens: The Secrets about Money--That You Don't Learn in School!
Kiyosaki, Robert T.
Paperback
American Spirits: The Famous Fox Sisters and the Mysterious Fad That Haunted a Nation
Rosenstock, Barb
Hardcover
The Big Fat High School Algebra 1 Workbook: 400+ Algebra 1 Practice Exercises
Workman Publishing
Paperback
Everything You Need to Ace Geometry in One Big Fat Notebook
Needham, Christy
Workman Publishing
Paperback
The Real Rosalind: The Truth about Rosalind Franklin's DNA Discovery and How It Was Erased
Dunn, Debbie Loren
Fox, Janet
Paperback
Azadi Means Freedom: Fighting for Gender Equity Through the World's Most Popular Game
Shojaei, Maryam
Hardcover
Brain Games - Sticker by Number - Vintage: Garden (28 Images to Sticker)
New Seasons
Brain Games
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
Cursive Handwriting Workbook for Teens: A cursive writing practice workbook for young adults and teens
Hippidoo
Lalgudi, Sujatha
Paperback
Everything You Need to Ace Chemistry in One Big Fat Notebook
Workman Publishing
Swanson, Jennifer
Paperback
Brain Games - Sticker by Number: Smile Every Day
New Seasons
Brain Games
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
A Tale of a Service Animal: A Heartwarming Tale of Disability Awareness, Friendship, and Kindness (Large Print Edition)
DiVietri, Melissa A.
Paperback
Everything You Need to Ace U.S. History in One Big Fat Notebook, 2nd Edition: The Complete Middle School Study Guide
Workman Publishing
Paperback
Neurodiversity for Teen Girls: Shine Bright as You Embrace Your Brain, Your Emotions, and Your Life
Roberts, Jamie D.
Paperback
The Case for Christ Student Edition: A Journalist's Personal Investigation of the Evidence for Jesus
Strobel, Lee
Paperback
Small Victories: A Coloring Book of Little Wins and Miniature Masterpieces
Basford, Johanna
Paperback
A Better World Is Possible: Global Youth Confront the Climate Crisis
Subramanian, Meera
Novgorodoff, Danica
Paperback
Master Guide to Drawing Anime: How to Draw Original Characters from Simple Templates - A How to Draw Anime / Manga Step by Step Book Series
Hart, Christopher
Paperback
Color & Frame - Country Gardens (Adult Coloring Book)
New Seasons
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
How to Money: Your Ultimate Visual Guide to the Basics of Finance
Tuggle, Kathryn
Chatzky, Jean
Paperback
99 Things to Do Before You Finish High School (Revised and Updated)
Villas, Evan
Jenkins, Steven
Stalder, Erika
Paperback
Personal Finance Doodle Notes: Brain Based Interactive Guided Notes
Danziger, Brigid
Giraffe, Math
Paperback
So, It's Your First Job: A Quick-Ish Guide to Navigating the Working World
Orozco-Onyskin, Mari
Paperback
Crochet for Beginners: Step-By-Step Instructions and Patterns
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
A Deathly Compendium of Poisonous Plants: Wicked Weeds and Sinister Seeds
Hirsch, Rebecca E.
Paperback
An Astonishing Circle: The Discovery and Denial of the Circulatory System
Parrott-Ryan, Maria
Paperback
The Big Fat High School Algebra 2 Workbook: 400+ Algebra 2 Practice Exercises
Workman Publishing
Paperback
My First Complete Learning Library: Boxset of 20 Board Books Gift Set for Kids
Wonder House Books
Hardcover
Lana del Rey: A Vibrant Journey Through the Career and Influence of the Timeless Indie-Pop Icon
Fragassi, Selena
Hardcover
Color & Frame - 3 Books in 1 - Animals, Seasons, Inspiration (Adult Coloring Book)
New Seasons
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
Integers and Order of Operations Math Workbook 6th to 8th Grade: Middle School Integers Workbook, PEMDAS
Publishing, Mathflare
Paperback
Women in Space: 23 Stories of First Flights, Scientific Missions, and Gravity-Breaking Adventures
Gibson, Karen Bush
Paperback
The Graduation Guidebook: What Every Student Needs to Know About Money and Life
Nermoe, Kathryn
Paperback
The Audhd Teen Survival Guide: Develop Self-Knowledge, Confidence, and Thrive as an Audhder!
Ali, Sonia
Paperback
Rebel Girls Make Dessert: Kid-Tested Recipes You Can Make, Bake, and Share!
Rebel Girls Inc
Paperback
The Ultimate Activity Book for Teens: Crosswords, Cryptograms, Trivia, and More!
Deneen, Valerie
Paperback
72 Prácticas Estoicas: Guía práctica de estoicismo para pensar con claridad y sufrir menos
Guerrero, Moisés
Paperback
Brain Games - Color by Number - Large Print: Patterns (Stress Free Coloring Book)
Brain Games
New Seasons
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
A 5 Is Against the Law: Social Boundaries - a Compassionate but Honest Guide for Teens and Young Adults
Dunn Buron, Kari
Paperback
Ban This!: How One School Fought Two Book Bans and Won (and How You Can Too)
Ellis, Christina
Ellis, Renee
Gupta, Edha
Paperback
Sabrina Carpenter: A Vibrant Journey Through the Career and Influence of a Pop Princess
Fragassi, Selena
Hardcover
The Easy Drawing Book for Teens: 20 Step-By-Step Projects to Improve Your Drawing Skills
Rizza, Angela
Paperback
Niv, Bible for Teens, Thinline Edition, Leathersoft, Blue, Red Letter Edition, Comfort Print
Zondervan
Hardcover
Preteen Devotional for Girls: 52 Weeks of Encouraging Devotions and Scripture for Tweens
Rust, Brittany
Paperback
The Vocabulary Workbook for 8th Grade: Weekly Activities to Boost Your Word Power
McLellan, Kelly Anne
Paperback
Color & Frame - In the Garden (Adult Coloring Book)
New Seasons
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
Color & Frame - By the Sea: Adult Coloring Book with Ocean Designs - Perforated Pages, Spiral Bound
New Seasons
Publications International Ltd
Paperback
The Case for Faith Student Edition: A Journalist Investigates the Toughest Objections to Christianity
Strobel, Lee
Paperback
Mental Toughness For Young Athletes: Eight Proven 5-Minute Mindset Exercises For Kids And Teens Who Play Competitive Sports
Horne, Moses
Horne, Troy
Paperback
Accountable: The True Story of a Racist Social Media Account and the Teenagers Whose Lives It Changed
Slater, Dashka
Hardcover