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Solar Wars: Mission Accomplished-ish
Paperback
Publisher Price: $16.99
Publisher: Ink Rift
Published: Jul 20 2025
Pages: 216
Weight: 0.65
Height: 0.46 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
They're not the best crew in the galaxy... just the loudest.
Meet the crew of the S.S. Delusion-a ship held together by duct tape, bad decisions, and one very overworked AI. They weren't assigned this mission. They weren't even supposed to be in space. But when a top-secret galactic transmission arrives at the wrong inbox, they do the only logical thing: accept it.
Why? Free snacks.
Captain Slade speaks only in dramatic pauses and vague gestures. SgtSquishyPants barks orders no one follows, from a clipboard that contains nothing useful. Amazingdizzo tracks near-death experiences like sports stats. Yellowsnow, the team's cursed optimist, somehow builds a sentient cake son during a repair. And Brenda, the ship's AI, has reached peak sarcasm and existential dread.
What begins as a not-at-all-authorized mission spirals into full-scale clone rebellions, diplomatic breakdowns (including one accidental engagement), a file war on Bureaucratia Prime, and a frosting-based planetary uprising. Oh-and the toilet opens into deep space now. Don't ask.
This is not a story of brave heroes saving the galaxy.
This is a story of four cosmic screw-ups who trip over the galaxy's problems and accidentally save it anyway.
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