Sign-In
Cart
Perl and the Exploding Buffalo: Perl's Script - Volume 2
Paperback
Please select the version of book you would like to purchase.
ISBN10: 1479268038
ISBN13: 9781479268030
Publisher: Createspace
Published: Oct 27 2012
Pages: 292
Weight: 0.87
Height: 0.61 Width: 5.98 Depth: 9.02
Language: English
ISBN13: 9781479268030
Publisher: Createspace
Published: Oct 27 2012
Pages: 292
Weight: 0.87
Height: 0.61 Width: 5.98 Depth: 9.02
Language: English
A buffalo in the City don't get no pity...
Perl and Hari start a fire and a French restaurant. They land up with a homicidal cook on the run from the French Police for the murder of a leading food critic, and a pair of waiters working towards a PhD in Chaos Theory. A gentlemanly buffalo called Jagan joins up as restaurant mascot, and is immediately converted into a four-legged bomb by the RATS terror group. But Perl has already embedded him with an experimental eViagra chip that sporadically turns him into a raging bovine Romeo, which makes him the quarry of Japanese super-spy Mata. Can Perl save Jagan from Mata and the RATS, and their cook from the French Police? This is what leading book critics say about Exploding Buffalo:
Perl and Hari start a fire and a French restaurant. They land up with a homicidal cook on the run from the French Police for the murder of a leading food critic, and a pair of waiters working towards a PhD in Chaos Theory. A gentlemanly buffalo called Jagan joins up as restaurant mascot, and is immediately converted into a four-legged bomb by the RATS terror group. But Perl has already embedded him with an experimental eViagra chip that sporadically turns him into a raging bovine Romeo, which makes him the quarry of Japanese super-spy Mata. Can Perl save Jagan from Mata and the RATS, and their cook from the French Police? This is what leading book critics say about Exploding Buffalo:
Telangana Herald: We're inclined to think it's some kind of a book...
Farm & Ag Review: The author turns his attention from the herding of goats to the breeding of water buffalos, bringing the same scientific insights that he had brought to bear in the previous volume. A must-have for professional buffalo breeders.
Daily BJ: The word Sex is used six times, this time. An improvement, but this chap has far to go before we'll recommend his books. Come on guys, critics will be critics. Read it and make up your own mind. Don't expect it to change your life - I mean, if you expect your life to change for $2.99, with discounts, what kind of life do you have, anyway? - But it'll help pass the long hours on a trans-Atlantic flight. A lot better than sampling the free alcohol and elbow wrestling your neighbor. Extract:
Well, young lady? asked Perl. Having another go at Jagan, I see.
Yes, ma'am, said Mata, too exhausted to argue.
Didn't I tell you his testicles were off-limits? You must fight this irrational urge for buffalo testicle curry. It is becoming a neurotic obsession with you.
Not testicle, brain, mumbled Mata. Bhutanese buffalo brain fry. Velly tasty.
So! You felt peckish for some brain fry, and you decided to de-brain poor Jagan? You can't just help yourself to his medulla oblongata because the spirit moves you! I am sure he needs it.
Moo! added Jagan He was attached to his cerebellum too.
Yes. Keep your hands off his medulla oblongata, and his cerebellum and cranium as well, young lady. Do I have to ban you from his individual body parts?
No, ma'am.
Next time you have an urge to taste prime rib steak, oxtail, trotters...whatever, remember, Jagan is not your one-point convenience store. We have Johnson Market for things like that.
Johnson Market closed at 2 AM, said Mata
Well, that's just too bad. Assuage your midnight hunger pangs with cheese and crackers. Stock your room with them. Desist from treating Jagan as your private larder.
Yes ma'am.
He is not a midnight snack.
No ma'am.
Moo! added Jagan.
Or breakfast, for that matter.
Yes ma'am.
Do I make myself clear?
Yes ma'am.
Very well, you may go now.
Farm & Ag Review: The author turns his attention from the herding of goats to the breeding of water buffalos, bringing the same scientific insights that he had brought to bear in the previous volume. A must-have for professional buffalo breeders.
Daily BJ: The word Sex is used six times, this time. An improvement, but this chap has far to go before we'll recommend his books. Come on guys, critics will be critics. Read it and make up your own mind. Don't expect it to change your life - I mean, if you expect your life to change for $2.99, with discounts, what kind of life do you have, anyway? - But it'll help pass the long hours on a trans-Atlantic flight. A lot better than sampling the free alcohol and elbow wrestling your neighbor. Extract:
Well, young lady? asked Perl. Having another go at Jagan, I see.
Yes, ma'am, said Mata, too exhausted to argue.
Didn't I tell you his testicles were off-limits? You must fight this irrational urge for buffalo testicle curry. It is becoming a neurotic obsession with you.
Not testicle, brain, mumbled Mata. Bhutanese buffalo brain fry. Velly tasty.
So! You felt peckish for some brain fry, and you decided to de-brain poor Jagan? You can't just help yourself to his medulla oblongata because the spirit moves you! I am sure he needs it.
Moo! added Jagan He was attached to his cerebellum too.
Yes. Keep your hands off his medulla oblongata, and his cerebellum and cranium as well, young lady. Do I have to ban you from his individual body parts?
No, ma'am.
Next time you have an urge to taste prime rib steak, oxtail, trotters...whatever, remember, Jagan is not your one-point convenience store. We have Johnson Market for things like that.
Johnson Market closed at 2 AM, said Mata
Well, that's just too bad. Assuage your midnight hunger pangs with cheese and crackers. Stock your room with them. Desist from treating Jagan as your private larder.
Yes ma'am.
He is not a midnight snack.
No ma'am.
Moo! added Jagan.
Or breakfast, for that matter.
Yes ma'am.
Do I make myself clear?
Yes ma'am.
Very well, you may go now.
Also in
Humor
I Can't Believe I Did That: The Game That Gives You Points for Sharing Awkward, Awesome, and Unforgettable Memories: Card Games
Nadelberg, David
Katcher, Neil
Other
$20.00
The Science Magpie: Fascinating Facts, Stories, Poems, Diagrams and Jokes Plucked from Science
Flynn, Simon
Paperback
From $9.99
How to Be a Cat: (Cat Books for Kids, Cat Gifts for Kids, Cat Picture Book)
Swerling, Lisa
Lazar, Ralph
Hardcover
$4.99
The Chapo Guide to Revolution: A Manifesto Against Logic, Facts, and Reason
Chapo Trap House
Hardcover
$11.99
Peculiar Questions and Practical Answers: A Little Book of Whimsy and Wisdom from the Files of the New York Public Library
New York Public Library
Hardcover
$9.99
How to Be Okay When Nothing Is Okay: Tips and Tricks That Kept Me Alive, Happy, and Creative in Spite of Myself
Lawson, Jenny
Hardcover
From $19.99
Wtf America?!: The Way Out of This Hell and Back to Democracy
Meiselas, Jordy
Meiselas, Ben
Meiselas, Brett
Hardcover
$30.88
Not Today, Fascists: The Lies That Got Us Here, and the Truths That Will Reunite Us
Welch, Jennifer
Hardcover
$26.09
Big Fan: Two Friends, 82,490 Miles, and the Wild, Wonderful Sports We Love
Posnanski, Joe
Schur, Michael
Hardcover
$31.50
Pardon My Book: Ten Years of the Best (and Worst) in Sports from Pardon My Take
Big Cat
Commenter, Pft
Hardcover
$33.25
How to Grow Up Without Becoming a Grown-Up: Big Lessons from Little Kids
Shapiro-Barnum, Julian
Hardcover
$23.40
We've Been Here the Whole Time!: A Not So Sacred Guide to All Things Native America
Clift, Joey
Paperback
$21.84
Black Out Loud: The Revolutionary History of Black Comedy from Vaudeville to '90s Sitcoms
Bennett, Geoff
Hardcover
$29.69
The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Five Novels in One Outrageous Volume
Adams, Douglas
Paperback
$23.40
We Are the World (Cup): A Personal History of the World's Greatest Sporting Event
Bennett, Roger
Hardcover
$27.00
The New Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Expert Advice for Extreme Situations
Borgenicht, David
Piven, Joshua
Hardcover
$18.95
Bake It Off: An Unofficial Taylor Swift-Inspired Cookbook for Every Era, from Breakfast to Midnights
Smith, Lindsey
Hardcover
From $12.99
There Are Moms Way Worse Than You: Irrefutable Proof That You Are Indeed a Fantastic Parent
Boozan, Glenn
Hardcover
$14.25
Nobody Wants Your Sh*t: The Art of Decluttering Before You Die (New York Times Bestseller)
Condo, Messie
Hardcover
$18.99
How to Talk to Your Cat about Gun Safety: And Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives
Auburn, Zachary
Paperback
From $6.99