Sign-In
Cart
Millennials Guide to Getting Old: A Comedy About Turning Forty
Paperback
Publisher: Independently Published
Published: Jun 12 2026
Pages: 94
Weight: 0.28
Height: 0.24 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
Forty is just a number. A loud, knee-cracking, deeply upsetting number.
Harrison is thirty-nine years old and absolutely fine, thank you for asking. He has a sensible job, a sensible mortgage and a knee that now announces itself on the stairs. Then a song he loved at eighteen comes on in the supermarket, a young cashier mentions that her dad loves it too, and something quietly breaks.
Enter Ryan: oldest friend, worst influence, and the man who, over one pint too many, scrawls a list on a beer mat. Ten challenges. Ten things they used to do without thinking back in their twenties. Pull an all-nighter. Survive a festival. Go viral. Recreate the one perfect day they had in the summer of 2004. Tick off all ten before Harrison turns forty, and prove that getting old is optional.
It turns out getting old is not optional.
What follows is a funny, nostalgic and heartwarming short story about friendship, ageing and the strange shock of realising that your youth is now considered retro. As Harrison and Ryan attempt to outrun time using nothing but nostalgia, energy drinks and ambitiously bad cardio, Harrison starts to suspect the goal was never to feel twenty again, and that he may have been measuring his whole life by the wrong thing.
For anyone who grew up on MSN Messenger and burned CDs, then woke up one morning to find they were the oldest person at the party.
Millennials' Guide to Getting Old is a warm, sharp and very British comedy short story about old friends, the decade none of us can quite let go of, and the unexpected relief of growing up.
Also in
Humor
I Can't Believe I Did That: The Game That Gives You Points for Sharing Awkward, Awesome, and Unforgettable Memories: Card Games
Nadelberg, David
Katcher, Neil
Other
The Science Magpie: Fascinating Facts, Stories, Poems, Diagrams and Jokes Plucked from Science
Flynn, Simon
Paperback
Fixing Flamingos: And Other Solutions to the World's Least Pressing Problems
Rea, Brian
Brown, Lucienne
Paperback
How to Be a Cat: (Cat Books for Kids, Cat Gifts for Kids, Cat Picture Book)
Lazar, Ralph
Swerling, Lisa
Hardcover
Peculiar Questions and Practical Answers: A Little Book of Whimsy and Wisdom from the Files of the New York Public Library
New York Public Library
Hardcover
How to Be Okay When Nothing Is Okay: Tips and Tricks That Kept Me Alive, Happy, and Creative in Spite of Myself
Lawson, Jenny
Hardcover
Bake It Off: An Unofficial Taylor Swift-Inspired Cookbook for Every Era, from Breakfast to Midnights
Smith, Lindsey
Hardcover
Big Fan: Two Friends, 82,490 Miles, and the Wild, Wonderful Sports We Love
Schur, Michael
Posnanski, Joe
Hardcover
Black Out Loud: The Revolutionary History of Black Comedy from Vaudeville to '90s Sitcoms
Bennett, Geoff
Hardcover
We Are the World (Cup): A Personal History of the World's Greatest Sporting Event
Bennett, Roger
Hardcover
Pardon My Book: Ten Years of the Best (and Worst) in Sports from Pardon My Take
Commenter, Pft
Big Cat
Hardcover
How to Grow Up Without Becoming a Grown-Up: Big Lessons from Little Kids
Shapiro-Barnum, Julian
Hardcover
The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Five Novels in One Outrageous Volume
Adams, Douglas
Paperback
The New Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Expert Advice for Extreme Situations
Borgenicht, David
Piven, Joshua
Hardcover
There Are Moms Way Worse Than You: Irrefutable Proof That You Are Indeed a Fantastic Parent
Boozan, Glenn
Hardcover
How to Talk to Your Cat about Gun Safety: And Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives
Auburn, Zachary
Paperback
Not Today, Fascists: The Lies That Got Us Here, and the Truths That Will Reunite Us
Welch, Jennifer
Hardcover
Nobody Wants Your Sh*t: The Art of Decluttering Before You Die (New York Times Bestseller)
Condo, Messie
Hardcover