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The Legend of Braggadocio: F#ck Thanksgiving, No Clucks Given
Paperback
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ISBN13: 9798251448078
Publisher: Independently Published
Published: Mar 9 2026
Pages: 100
Weight: 0.43
Height: 0.26 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
Publisher: Independently Published
Published: Mar 9 2026
Pages: 100
Weight: 0.43
Height: 0.26 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
What if the turkey on your table was a world-renowned atheist philosopher who spent his entire life proving that you didn't exist?
In the heart of Gobble-land and Cluckdom, a revolution is brewing, and it has nothing to do with corn. Meet Braggadocio: a four-foot-tall Alpha Tom with shimmering bronze plumage and a voice measured in thunderous Braggadecibels (BdB). As the Prince of Western Turkeys, Braggadocio has a mission: to debunk the theory of Thanksgiving once and for all.
In the heart of Gobble-land and Cluckdom, a revolution is brewing, and it has nothing to do with corn. Meet Braggadocio: a four-foot-tall Alpha Tom with shimmering bronze plumage and a voice measured in thunderous Braggadecibels (BdB). As the Prince of Western Turkeys, Braggadocio has a mission: to debunk the theory of Thanksgiving once and for all.
His logic is airtight. He calls it the Braggadocio Proof: If the Two-Legged Homo Sapiens-God were real, a bird of his magnificent stature would have been roasted years ago. Since he is still strutting, he concludes that humans-and their ovens-are nothing more than a collective, seasonal hallucination.
Welcome to the No Fucks Given (NFG) Jamboree.
Held in the suspiciously open cornfield of Farmer Giles, the NFG Jamboree is the intellectual Super Bowl of the avian world. Braggadocio has assembled a High Table of feathered heavyweights to provide the scientific scaffolding for his grand delusion:
The Legend of Braggadocio is a supercharged, cynical, and hilariously dark satire that pits meta-narrative against metal brute force. Dr. Samuel Chuks Japhets weaves a tapestry of existentialism, partisan politics, and gravy-soaked tragedy that serves as a mirror to our own human denial of mortality.
Are you ready to face the Gravy of Contingency?
Buy this book today. Because in a world of basting brushes and infrared goggles, the ultimate Oh of realization comes only when it's too late to leave the roasting pan.
Welcome to the No Fucks Given (NFG) Jamboree.
Held in the suspiciously open cornfield of Farmer Giles, the NFG Jamboree is the intellectual Super Bowl of the avian world. Braggadocio has assembled a High Table of feathered heavyweights to provide the scientific scaffolding for his grand delusion:
- J.P. Gobble Sartre: The existentialist who declares, Existence precedes Gravy!
- Bee Cluck Russell: The logician who proves the statement Humans eat turkeys is empirically unverifiable.
- Archbishop Gobble HellNo: The spiritual titan who uses the Ancient Pecklogia to prove turkeys are the Day 5 elite, senior to the Day 6 human late-comers.
- Princess Turkeyana: The multi-genre superstar and business mogul who refuses to marry Braggadocio until he proves the knife doesn't exist.
The Legend of Braggadocio is a supercharged, cynical, and hilariously dark satire that pits meta-narrative against metal brute force. Dr. Samuel Chuks Japhets weaves a tapestry of existentialism, partisan politics, and gravy-soaked tragedy that serves as a mirror to our own human denial of mortality.
Are you ready to face the Gravy of Contingency?
Buy this book today. Because in a world of basting brushes and infrared goggles, the ultimate Oh of realization comes only when it's too late to leave the roasting pan.
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