Open Daily: 10am - 10pm | Alley door pickup 10am - 7pm 3038 Hennepin Ave Minneapolis, MN
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  • Open Daily: 10am - 10pm
    Alley-side Pickup: 10am - 7pm

    3038 Hennepin Ave Minneapolis, MN
    612-822-4611

Open Daily: 10am - 10pm | Alley-side Pickup: 10am - 7pm
3038 Hennepin Ave Minneapolis, MN
612-822-4611
Everyone Is Toxic But Me: The Perfect Excuse for Avoiding Someone Who Gets on Your Nerves

Everyone Is Toxic But Me: The Perfect Excuse for Avoiding Someone Who Gets on Your Nerves

Arstar, J.

Paperback

HumorGeneral Psychology

ISBN13: 9798176591712
Publisher: Independently Published
Published: Sep 23 2026
Pages: 102
Weight: 0.28
Height: 0.21 Width: 5.50 Depth: 8.50
Language: English
I have removed four people from my life, and all four were toxic. I know because I was the one who ran the test. It wasn't until the third one that I noticed the test had never come back negative.

A comedy, and a confession disguised as an essay. The narrator of Everyone Is Toxic But Me has used the word the way millions of us use it: about a friend who called too often, a college friend who told the truth about a business plan, a mother with one recurring comment and, once, about the person the word was actually invented for. He has taken the ten-signs quizzes, gone no contact with a group chat and bought the $497 boundaries course. Then a mutual friend let slip what one of the four called him.

Following the self-help script in its own order, detect, cut, heal, the book takes apart the most convenient word of the age: where it came from (a chemical dump, a bestseller, a pop song, a financial crisis), why it sounds like a diagnosis when it isn't one, what the poison metaphor decides on your behalf before you've decided anything, how a group of friends heals by expelling one member, why a verdict travels where a description won't, and who is making money from your grudges.

It ends with the only test that ever returns a negative: four questions about what someone did, not what someone is. Specific, repeated, unrepentant, harmful. Applied honestly, it clears three of the narrator's four cases and convicts the one that deserved it, which is also the chapter where the word gets rescued for the people who actually need it.

Sharp, self-implicating and quietly funny, this is a book for anyone who has said I deserve better without asking: better than what. And for anyone who has been called toxic and would like to know whether the person who said it could name a single thing they did.

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