Sign-In
Cart
Daddy's A SIMP: Don't Expect Much Inheritance
Paperback
Series: Rejected Children's Books (Funny Books for Adults), Book 14
Publisher: Independently Published
Published: Sep 13 2020
Pages: 28
Weight: 0.20
Height: 0.07 Width: 8.50 Depth: 8.50
Language: English
Dad lost mom. Dad got back on his feet. Dad found someone new. So far so good. Then he bought her a house. This book covers what happened in between those events and why you should probably lower your expectations about the will.
Illustrated with cartoon art and told with the kind of blunt honesty that only comes from something that has nothing to lose, this is the story of a grown man making choices that technically no one can stop him from making. It is his money. He is just very bad at having it.
This Book IS For:- Adult children who have noticed the bank account situation and are concerned
- Anyone who watched someone they love make an obviously bad decision and said nothing
- People who find financial self-destruction oddly relatable
- Gift-givers with a specific and pointed message to deliver
- Dads who are simps and have not yet been informed
- Anyone who has reported a social media post for inappropriate content in the past year
- Financial advisors who take their work home with them emotionally
- People who believe love is a sound reason to buy someone a house
- Family reunions where someone needs to address the elephant in the room
- White elephant exchanges with a very specific target in mind
- Bachelor parties for men who appear to be making similar choices
- Any occasion where a gentle intervention is warranted but will not happen
A greeting card that says Congrats on the new relationship costs nearly as much as this and communicates exactly nothing. This book communicates something. It does so with cartoon art and a last page that will sit with the recipient for a while. Possibly through the holidays.
You are not being cruel. You are being economical. You spent the same as a card, and instead of cardboard, someone has a book they will reference for years. At minimum, they will think of it every time they check dad's payment activity. That is a gift that keeps giving.
Also in
Humor
I Can't Believe I Did That: The Game That Gives You Points for Sharing Awkward, Awesome, and Unforgettable Memories: Card Games
Nadelberg, David
Katcher, Neil
Other
The Science Magpie: Fascinating Facts, Stories, Poems, Diagrams and Jokes Plucked from Science
Flynn, Simon
Paperback
Fixing Flamingos: And Other Solutions to the World's Least Pressing Problems
Rea, Brian
Brown, Lucienne
Paperback
How to Be a Cat: (Cat Books for Kids, Cat Gifts for Kids, Cat Picture Book)
Lazar, Ralph
Swerling, Lisa
Hardcover
Peculiar Questions and Practical Answers: A Little Book of Whimsy and Wisdom from the Files of the New York Public Library
New York Public Library
Hardcover
How to Be Okay When Nothing Is Okay: Tips and Tricks That Kept Me Alive, Happy, and Creative in Spite of Myself
Lawson, Jenny
Hardcover
Bake It Off: An Unofficial Taylor Swift-Inspired Cookbook for Every Era, from Breakfast to Midnights
Smith, Lindsey
Hardcover
Big Fan: Two Friends, 82,490 Miles, and the Wild, Wonderful Sports We Love
Schur, Michael
Posnanski, Joe
Hardcover
Black Out Loud: The Revolutionary History of Black Comedy from Vaudeville to '90s Sitcoms
Bennett, Geoff
Hardcover
We Are the World (Cup): A Personal History of the World's Greatest Sporting Event
Bennett, Roger
Hardcover
How to Grow Up Without Becoming a Grown-Up: Big Lessons from Little Kids
Shapiro-Barnum, Julian
Hardcover
Pardon My Book: Ten Years of the Best (and Worst) in Sports from Pardon My Take
Big Cat
Commenter, Pft
Hardcover
The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Five Novels in One Outrageous Volume
Adams, Douglas
Paperback
There Are Moms Way Worse Than You: Irrefutable Proof That You Are Indeed a Fantastic Parent
Boozan, Glenn
Hardcover
The New Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Expert Advice for Extreme Situations
Borgenicht, David
Piven, Joshua
Hardcover
How to Talk to Your Cat about Gun Safety: And Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives
Auburn, Zachary
Paperback
Nobody Wants Your Sh*t: The Art of Decluttering Before You Die (New York Times Bestseller)
Condo, Messie
Hardcover