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Four Short Stories By Emile Zola
Paperback
Classic FictionGeneral FictionLiterary Fiction
Publisher: Eileen Library
Published: Sep 2 2026
Pages: 40
Weight: 0.15
Height: 0.08 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
MY PASSING
I
t was on a Saturday, at six in the morning, that I died after a three days'
illness. My wife was searching a trunk for some linen, and when she rose
and turned she saw me rigid, with open eyes and silent pulses. She ran to
me, fancying that I had fainted, touched my hands and bent over me. Then
she suddenly grew alarmed, burst into tears and stammered:
My God, my God! He is dead!
I heard everything, but the sounds seemed to come from a great distance.
My left eye still detected a faint glimmer, a whitish light in which all objects
melted, but my right eye was quite bereft of sight. It was the coma of my
whole being, as if a thunderbolt had struck me. My will was annihilated;
not a fiber of flesh obeyed my bidding. And yet amid the impotency of my
inert limbs my thoughts subsisted, sluggish and lazy, still perfectly clear.
My poor Marguerite was crying; she had dropped on her knees beside the
bed, repeating in heart-rending tones:
He is dead! My God, he is dead!
3 ÉMILE ZOLA
Was this strange state of torpor, this immobility of the flesh, really death,
although the functions of the intellect were not arrested? Was my soul only
lingering for a brief space before it soared away forever? From my childhood
upward I had been subject to hysterical attacks, and twice in early youth
I had nearly succumbed to nervous fevers. By degrees all those who sur-
rounded me had got accustomed to consider me an invalid and to see me
sickly. So much so that I myself had forbidden my wife to call in a doctor
when I had taken to my bed on the day of our arrival at the cheap lodging-
house of the Rue Dauphine in Paris. A little rest would soon set me right
again; it was only the fatigue of the journey which had caused my intolera-
ble weariness. And yet I was conscious of having felt singularly uneasy. We
had left our province somewhat abruptly; we were very poor and had barely
enough money to support ourselves till I drew my first month's salary in the
office where I had obtained a situation. And now a sudden seizure was car-
rying me off!
Was it really death? I had pictured to myself a darker night, a deeper silence.
As a little child I had already felt afraid to die. Being weak and compassion-
ately petted by everyone, I had concluded that I had not long to live, that
I should soon be buried, and the thought of the cold earth filled me with a
dread I could not master-a dread which haunted me day and night. As I
grew older the same terror pursued me. Sometimes, after long hours spent
in reasoning with myself, I thought that I had conquered my fear. I reflected,
After all, what does it matter? One dies and all is over. It is the common
fate; nothing could be better or easier.
I then prided myself on being able to look death boldly in the face, but sud-
denly a shiver froze my blood, and my dizzy anguish returned, as if a giant
hand had swung me over a dark abyss. It was some vision of the earth re-
turning and setting reason at naught. How often at night did I start up in
bed, not knowing what cold breath had swept over my slumbers but clasp-
ing my despairing hands and moaning, Must I die? In those moments
an icy horror would stop my pulses while an appalling vision of
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