Yorick's Sentimental Journey Continued, to Which Is Prefixed Some Account of the Life and Writings of Mr. Sterne

This historic book may have numerous typos and missing text. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. Not indexed. Not illustrated. 1902 Excerpt: ...as well as real pander, advised him to marry, and thereby repair the injury he had done to his fortune. An opportunity soon offered: A city heiress was to be disposed of, and bartered for a title and a noble connection. A drysalter's daughter, with two hundred thousand pounds, had charms sufficient for Lord Spindle. The treaty was made, the match settled and the consummation took place in less than three months. His Lordship had soon after reason to find, that all the injury he had done by his debaucheries was not confined to his fortune, but that his constitution had more than proportionably been impaired. In a word, his physicians advised him to take a journey to Montpellier, as the only means left of recovery. Dare we pretend to inquire how it fared with Lady Spindle? She returned home to her father, two hundred thousand pounds worse in pocket, and almost as many millions in constitution. A divorce soon after took place, -and his Lordship recovered; but not without some incisions and amputations, which made him all his life curse Italian concubines. His honest tutor still attended him, and consoled him with all the rhetoric he was master of. He had adopted the system of predestination, though he had never taught it before, finding it the best suited to his present doctrine. He told his Lordship, that every man was born to have a certain number of p s, as every woman was to have a certain number of children; and that therefore, the sooner they got them over the better. Lord Spindle could not be accused of any great depth of understanding, or any great shrewdness in discovering the wrong or the right side of an argument.--A little sophistry passed upon him for profound Logic; and when he heard it dogmatically pronounced from his tutor, he could not pretend ...