Restoration Blues: Poems of a Faith in Deconstruction

In 2012, I was deep in a faith deconstruction I didn't yet have words for. Looking back, I realize it had been happening for nearly twenty years, a slow unraveling of certainty, a quiet shift in the foundation. That year, I was writing intensely-articles for a progressive Christian magazine, poems spilling out in the margins. In the years since, most of my creative energy has been in songwriting, but something about this moment, about 2025, made me look closer at the road I've traveled to get here. That deeper reflection led to an album, but also to this collection.

These poems are not just about where I am now, though they do hold pieces of that. More than that, they trace the path-sometimes raw, sometimes painful-that brought me here. There are moments of anger, of judgment, even bitterness. That's the nature of deconstruction. When the world you've known begins to crumble, it doesn't fall quietly. It shakes, it fractures, and for a time, all that's left is dust. But if we're lucky, if we keep searching, we find something on the other side. A home, maybe. Or at least, the hope of one.

Though my relationship with institutional faith has faded, my spiritual walk has never stopped. I still carry the hymns of my childhood, the kindnesses of my family, the moments of real love shown by my church communities. I honor what shaped me, even as I acknowledge what I had to leave behind.

My hope is that these poems might offer something to those traveling a similar path-those watching their own certainties break apart, wondering if anything will be left standing. If that's you, I want to say this: Keep walking. Keep searching. If you're truly looking for home, I believe you'll find it.