Sign-In
Cart
Never Fitting In: My Journey with Parental Trauma, Addiction, Healing
Hardcover
Series: Holocaust Heritage
ISBN13: 9789493418974
Publisher: Amsterdam Publishers
Published: Apr 13 2026
Pages: 228
Weight: 1.02
Height: 0.69 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
In 1938, during Kristallnacht, Sonia Ascher's father was seized by the Nazis from his home in Germany and taken to Buchenwald Concentration Camp. This memoir follows her passage from a frightened child to an adult coping with the consequences of generational trauma that left her searching for answers to lifelong unasked questions. How did Sonia's identity as a Jewish child of Holocaust survivors keep her separated from the largely Christian environment in which she was raised in America? And where did she belong?
This event and the complete change in her parents' lives has a profound impact on Sonia. She shows how parental trauma leads to excessive control and silence. Turning to food for comfort, her lack of understanding and fear of what could happen to her, Sonia becomes hypervigilant to perceived dangers. Cultivating the desire not to cause her parents additional pain and sublimating her own needs, it takes Sonia most of her life to develop the inner resources required to become a fully functioning adult. As she moves from dysfunctional behavior to developing her ability to make good decisions, Sonia learns the truth about what her family endured, and matures to a well-adapted individual.
Her life comes full circle when, in 2024, Sonia accepts Germany's restoration citizenship program and becomes a naturalized German citizen. After many years of searching for her place in this world, she finally finds it.
Also in
Holocaust
Time's Echo: The Second World War, the Holocaust, and the Music of Remembrance
Eichler, Jeremy
Hardcover
The Devil's Diary: Alfred Rosenberg and the Stolen Secrets of the Third Reich
Kinney, David
Wittman, Robert K.
Paperback
Memories of a Good Meal: Recipes of Resilience Inspired by Stories of World War II Survival
Shaya, Alon
Hersh, June
Hardcover
The Gambler: How Penniless Dropout Kirk Kerkorian Became the Greatest Deal Maker in Capitalist History
Rempel, William C.
Paperback
In the Garden of Beasts: Love, Terror, and an American Family in Hitler's Berlin
Larson, Erik
Paperback
Conversations with an Executioner: 255 Days Imprisoned with the Nazi Who Destroyed the Warsaw Ghetto
Moczarski, Kazimierz
Paperback
Ordinary Men: Reserve Police Battalion 101 and the Final Solution in Poland
Browning, Christopher R.
Paperback
The Girl Bandits of the Warsaw Ghetto: The True Story of Five Courageous Young Women Who Sparked an Uprising
Hyman, Elizabeth R.
Paperback
The Traitors Circle: The True Story of a Secret Resistance Network in Nazi Germany--And the Spy Who Betrayed Them
Freedland, Jonathan
Hardcover
The Dressmakers of Auschwitz: The True Story of the Women Who Sewed to Survive
Adlington, Lucy
Paperback
The Art Spy: The Extraordinary Untold Tale of WWII Resistance Hero Rose Valland
Young, Michelle
Paperback
The Hotel on Place Vendome: Life, Death, and Betrayal at the Hotel Ritz in Paris
Mazzeo, Tilar J.
Paperback
A Train in Winter: An Extraordinary Story of Women, Friendship, and Resistance in Occupied France
Moorehead, Caroline
Paperback
Little Edna's War: A True Story of Resistance and Hope. A Gripping WWII page-turner
Bond Brill, Janet
Paperback
Killing the SS: The Hunt for the Worst War Criminals in History
Dugard, Martin
O'Reilly, Bill
Paperback
The Holocaust Industry: Reflections on the Exploitation of Jewish Suffering
Finkelstein, Norman G.
Paperback
Resisting Nazism: True Stories of Resistance to the World's Most Dangerous Ideology, from 1920 to the Present
Berryman, Luke
Hardcover
Dreaming of the River: A Mother and Daughter's Fight for Survival during the Holocaust
Steinhorn, Pauline
Paperback
I Seek a Kind Person: My Father, Seven Children, and the Adverts That Helped Them Escape the Holocaust
Borger, Julian
Paperback
Hidden in Plain Sight: A Family Memoir and the Untold Story of the Holocaust in Serbia
Brill, Julie
Paperback
My Struggle: English Translation of Mein Kamphf - Mein Kampt - Mein Kampf
Mein Kampf, Kamphf English Kampt
Hitler, Adolf
Murphy, James
Paperback
The Escape Artist: The Man Who Broke Out of Auschwitz to Warn the World
Freedland, Jonathan
Paperback
It Happened in Italy: Untold Stories of How the People of Italy Defied the Horrors of the Holocaust
Bettina, Elizabeth
Paperback
Transforming Darkness Into Light: A Holocaust Survivor's Lessons in Fighting Hate
Lazowski, Philip
Hardcover
The Watchmaker's Daughter: The True Story of World War II Heroine Corrie Ten Boom
Loftis, Larry
Paperback
In the Garden of Beasts: Love, Terror, and an American Family in Hitler's Berlin
Larson, Erik
Hardcover
The Secret Inquisition: The Untold Story of Mussolini, the Vatican, and Fascist Italy's War on the Jews
Kertzer, David I.
Hardcover
La Bailarina de Auschwitz. Edición Tapa Dura / The Choice: Embrace the Possible
Eger, Edith
Hardcover
Divine Corners: In the Shadow of the Holocaust on a Catskills Chicken Farm
Friedman, Michelle
Paperback
Was it Just a Matter of Luck?: A Family, the Holocaust, and the Founding of a Museum
Kaner, Charles
Hardcover
The Traitors Circle: The Rebels Against the Nazis--And the Spy Who Betrayed Them
Freedland, Jonathan
Paperback
Plunder and Survival: Stories of Theft, Loss, Recovery, and Migration of Nazi Uprooted Art
Wilentz, Abigail
Loebl, Suzanne
Hardcover
Little Edna's War: A True story of Resistance and Hope. A Gripping WWII page-turner
Bond Brill, Janet
Hardcover
On Both Sides of the Wall: A Resistance Fighter's Firsthand Account of the Warsaw Ghetto
Meed, Vladka
Meed, Steven D.
Hardcover
The Daughter of Auschwitz: My Story of Resilience, Survival and Hope
Brabant, Malcolm
Friedman, Tova
Paperback
The Sisters of Auschwitz: The True Story of Two Jewish Sisters' Resistance in the Heart of Nazi Territory
Van Iperen, Roxane
Paperback
The Shadow and the Flame: A Story of Loss, Survival, and the Making of Holocaust Memory
McAuley, James
Hardcover
On Sunny Days We Sang: A Holocaust Story of Survival and Resilience
Grunhaus de Gelman, Jeannette
Paperback
90 Charles Street: Girlhood in an immigrant Jewish family in Greenwich Village
Landau-Carter, Jennifer
Paperback
The Men with the Pink Triangle: The True, Life-And-Death Story of Homosexuals in the Nazi Death Camps
Heger, Heinz
Paperback
The Volunteer: The True Story of the Resistance Hero Who Infiltrated Auschwitz
Fairweather, Jack
Paperback
Anne Frank Remembered: The Story of the Woman Who Helped to Hide the Frank Family
Gies, Miep
Gold, Alison Leslie
Paperback
Trilogía de la Noche: La Noche, El Alba, El Día (Memorias) / The Night Trilogy: Night, Dawn, and Day (a Memoir)
Wiesel, Elie
Paperback
Sacred Betrayal: How the French Catholic Church Broke Its Pledge to Protect Jews During the Holocaust
Luft, Aliza
Hardcover
Nuremberg's Citizen Prosecutor: Benjamin Ferencz and the Birth of International Justice
Gordon, Gregory S.
Hardcover
Dreaming of the River: A Mother and Daughter's Fight for Survival during the Holocaust
Steinhorn, Pauline
Hardcover
A Brilliant Life: My Mother's Inspiring True Story of Surviving the Holocaust
Unreich, Rachelle
Paperback
The Shortest History of Germany: From Roman Frontier to the Heart of Europe - A Retelling for Our Times
Hawes, James
Paperback
The Light of Days: The Untold Story of Women Resistance Fighters in Hitler's Ghettos
Batalion, Judy
Paperback
Shores Beyond Shores: From Holocaust to Hope - A Bergen-Belsen Survivor's True Story
Bidwell, John D.
Holloway, Kris
Butter, Irene Hasenberg
Paperback
The Hoax of the Twentieth Century: The Case Against the Presumed Extermination of European Jewry
Butz, Arthur Robert
Paperback
50 Children: One Ordinary American Couple's Extraordinary Rescue Mission Into the Heart of Nazi Germany
Pressman, Steven
Paperback
The Dutchman's Suitcase: A young man's story of wartime forced labour in Nazi Germany
Seltzer, Brad &. Elisabeth
Paperback
The Survivor: How I Made It Through Six Concentration Camps and Became a Nazi Hunter
Lewkowicz, Josef
Hardcover
From Fugitive to Freedom: The Amazing Story of How a Holocaust Survivor Became a Nazi Hunter
Boeki, Jack
Boeki, Anna-Lea
Paperback
El Diario de Anne Frank (Novela Gráfica) / Anne Frank's Diary: The Graphic Adaptation
Frank, Anne
Hardcover
By the Grace of the Game: The Holocaust, a Basketball Legacy, and an Unprecedented American Dream
Grunfeld, Dan
Paperback
The Swimmer of Auschwitz: The Incredible True Story of the Olympic Hero Who Swam for His Life
Leblond, Renaud
Paperback
Rescue Board: The Untold Story of America's Efforts to Save the Jews of Europe
Erbelding, Rebecca
Paperback
Living among the Dead: My Grandmother's Holocaust Survival Story of Love and Strength
Bernstein Astrowsky, Adena
Paperback