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All the Ghosts I Bring Home
Paperback
Biographies GeneralMedical ReferenceMental Health
Publisher: Independently Published
Published: Nov 17 2025
Pages: 104
Weight: 0.33
Height: 0.22 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
Nurses are trained to save lives. No one teaches them how to survive their own mind.
Starting as a CNA at just seventeen, Christopher T. Perkins learned early what it meant to sit with the dying. He watched an old man's eyes turn gray as he took his last breath-and then was expected to move on like nothing happened.
From there, Christopher's career took him into the heart of a Level 1 trauma ER, where overdoses, crashes, and codes became part of his normal. On the outside, he was the calm nurse everyone wanted in a crisis. On the inside, the ghosts were piling up.
After a string of devastating cases-including a teen his own age and an infant who didn't survive-Christopher's depression and PTSD spiraled into suicidal thoughts. One day, after a night shift, he found himself planning how to end his life. Instead, he picked up the phone, called his employer's mental health line, and walked into therapy.
Diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, and severe depression, Christopher eventually left the ER, moved to California, and continued his work in the ICU-this time with medication, therapy, and a commitment to tell the truth about what nursing had done to his mental health.
In All the Ghosts I Bring Home, Christopher shares his story with raw honesty and compassion-for himself, for other nurses, and for anyone who loves them.
This book is for you if:
You're a nurse who has ever driven home in tears or silence.
You've wondered if you're too weak for a job that's breaking your heart and mind.
You love a nurse and want to understand why they're not the same person they were before this work.
This is not a story of easy answers or neat recovery. It's a story of injury, survival, medication, therapy, ICU shifts, and one simple, defiant choice:
To stay-and to finally tell the truth.
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